Why do you thin Holden cries before he leaves Pencey??

     After his fight with Stradlater, Holden decides to leave Pencey Prep and hang out in New York City for a few days before going home. However, as he leaves his dormitory, Holden shouts out, "Sleep tight! Ya' morons," at the top of his lungs and sheds some tears as well. Holden's crying is quite interesting because his negative thoughts and feelings towards the people at Pencey strongly suggests that he hates the school. After some thought I came to the conclusion that Holden cries while leaving Pencey for multiple reasons.
     The first reason Holden cries is because he didn't actually "hate" his school. Holden is a very critical thinker and pinpoints the negative aspects of everyone and everything, and because the vast majority of the book is composed of Holden's negative observations, readers form the bias that Holden hates his school. However, if you look at Holden's actions, rather than his monologue, it is evident that he actually likes some aspects of the people he says so many bad things about. For example, when Stradlater tells Holden to do his english homework for him, he does it without much complain, and although Holden goes on and on about how dirty Ackley is, he goes to the movies with him and goes to talk to him after his fight with Stradlater.
     The second reason that Holden cries as he leaves Pencey is simply because he was disappointed in himself as well as his community. Throughout the book, Holden exemplifies an interesting disability to communicate with other people. He doesn't know how to express his feelings and because his thoughts and emotions aren't presented externally, there are times when he does a lot of unexpected things, like when he punches Stradlater in the face, or when he horses around with his friends. Because of his lack of communication, Holden gets very angry at the people around him for not being able to understand him, which is why he is disappointed at his community. However, it's not only with other people that Holden can't communicate. I think Holden has a lot of trouble understanding his own emotions. One of the quotes that is constantly repeated throughout the book is, "I don't know." Even while he's shedding tears while leaving Pencey, Holden says he doesn't know why he's crying. Holden's lack of understanding of his own emotions causes a lot of confusion, which is why say that he's not only disappointed in others, but himself as well.
    Lastly, the final reason why I think Holden cries as he leaves Pencey is because his departure marks the beginning of his reluctant submission towards phoniness. Right before he leaves Pencey, Holden sells his typewriter, one of the few devices that helps him communicate his own feelings, that gave him a better understanding of himself. By abandoning his typewriter, Holden blocks his emotions and feelings and submits to the phoniness of society. This can also be seen through his actions after he leaves Pencey. Right after leaving his school, Holden begins to practice phoniness very actively. He says a lot of lies to capture the attention of a classmate's mother who he meets coincidentally on a bus, and presents himself as a 21 year old, Jim Steele, to the people he meets in New York.